#99 (AFI):
The Nutty Professor
Year: 1963
Directed by: Jerry Lewis
Written by: Jerry Lewis, Bill Richmond
Starring: Jerry Lewis
Seanbaby: They shouldn't have counted a movie that was made 10 times better just by adding Eddy Murphy in a grandma suit and having him fart.
Erik: I like Jerry Lewis movies. But they've all run together in my head so that I can't remember specific details about any of them, or pick one over the other in order to put it onto my top 100 list. I'm sure it's the same for the AFI. So what they should have done here is simply picked the Jerry Lewis movie with the best title. For me,
that's Cinderfella. Because of their obsession with laughing at men dressed up as women, I'm really surprised the AFI didn't pick Cinderfella too.
Kthor: I have a soft spot in my head for Jerry Lewis, and sometimes hulking eight-year-olds come by my desk and put their thumbs in it. That causes spastic brain functions, sort of akin to the spastic brain functions of the dried-up hosewashers at the AFI when they put this perfect example of vintage Jerry Lewis genius so far down on their list. 99 my Luftbaloon!
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#99 (IFLS):
Dogma
Year: 1999
Directed by: Kevin Smith
Written by: Kevin Smith
Starring: Matt Damon, Ben Affleck, Salma Hayek, Chris Rock, George Carlin, Alan Rickman, Kevin Smith, and that kid that says all the stupid shit
Seanbaby: Movies starring God drive me crazy. Not because I don't believe in that crap-- I don't believe in Yoda either, and movies about star wars don't drive me crazy. The reason they bug me is because the plot in God movies ends up being a huge waste of time. There's no reason for characters to go through so much trouble when God is there. By the end of the movie He ends up doing crazy god stuff anyway. Remember in The Stand where God had humanity go on an elaborate quest to destroy evil, and when it wasn't working out, he just sent a huge magic hand down to set off a nuclear device? I'm no supreme diety, but I think it would save time if God used His power over time and space to turn all the bad guys into ice cream instead of letting the heroes suffer. In Dogma, when you realize that the chick that created the universe was watching the whole time, it might as well have been Chris Rock waking up and saying, "It was all just a dream!" Or Burt Reynolds getting to the end of the Cannonball Run and realizing that during the entire race, all he had to do was click his heels together to win. Oh, and Kevin Smith, casting Alanis Morissette as God is something a chick would do.
Kthor: Hi, my name is Kevin Smith. Is that a communion wafer in your pocket or are you just glad to see me? HAR HAR HAR. The best part about this movie is this fat slob dork’s hilarious Marvel Comics version of Catholicism. Looks like all the priestly sperm didn’t make it all the way through his layers of glutinous ass-fat to his brain.
Erik: I could only remember 80 really funny movies, so I padded my list with twenty comedies nobody else would pick, rendering them - I thought - meaningless. I guess the StompTokyo guys did the same thing, though, because that's the only reason I can think of to explain why they put Dogma on a list of the best comedies of all time. All I can say at this point is that I'm sorry and that #99 should have gone to Clifford.
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